Sometimes what we want and what is best don’t coincide. So for now, so long my friends.
Dear Blogging World and My Dedicated Readers,
After much reflection, a few tantrums, and a great dose of reality, I have determined that full-time professional blogging isn’t for me. I know that there are many, many full-time bloggers that earn incomes or do it for the love of writing that will argue with my reasons but the truth is, they are MY reasons, so all arguments are invalid.
You see, I started blogging partially as a way to earn a side income but mostly as a way to help people. I wanted to share things that I knew that other people could benefit from knowing; whether those things were about gardening, parenting, budgeting, or cooking. And I did. I shared a lot of things that I’m proud to have on this blog and proud to have written.
But there is another side to professional blogging – one that I’m not so comfortable with. See, when this is your “job” you are expected to perform it with some degree of consistency and frequency. Full-time bloggers produce new content at least weekly, usually more. And this is great for a lot of people. But for me, I didn’t have enough important things to say. And I’m sick of clogging up the internet.
We have this AMAZING invention, this amazing tool, that can be used for SO MUCH good, and I’ve wasted it to try to fill a quota. I’ve written posts to take up space. And I don’t want to anymore.
Blogging has helped me meet a lot of awesome people and find some great blogs that I like to read. But it’s also opened me up to accusations and insults that people would have otherwise kept to themselves. In short, it has caused me to be less confident and happy in some ways. Blogging is a very vulnerable vocation and when posts are rejected or ridiculed or flat out ignored, it’s sometimes hard to handle.
It takes time. Oh, so much time! I tried to limit my blogging to naptime and bedtime. My oldest has stopped napping, and since I’ve taken the past few weeks to step away from blogging, it hasn’t bothered me. Before, I would get furious that he wouldn’t just lay down and be quiet for a few hours! (What active 4 year old boy is going to lay quietly for a few hours?!) I got frustrated when people called me during my blogging time. I was angry at having other jobs to accomplish during this short window such as laundry, important calls, budgeting, heck, anything that needed to be done when children aren’t around. There was one window of time during the day to blog and it wasn’t enough. And I was angry.
I stopped blogging a few weeks ago and I haven’t be angry like that since. Because now, when Casey comes to my door during his rest time to tell me he isn’t tired, he isn’t interrupting anything important. When my sisters call me any time during my typical “business hours,” I gladly answer and catch up with them.
Not to mention, I don’t immerse myself in the blogging world like I used to. I see less of everyone else’s “picture perfect” lives and therefore feel like less of a failure. I’m not comparing myself to their parenting, their decorating, their cooking, or their writing skills anymore. I don’t judge myself based on every other post I’ve seen this week…because I’m not seeing the posts anymore.
I’m not saying I’m done and gone forever. If I have things of utmost import to contribute, things that I feel are important or unique and won’t clog the internet, I’ll be here to share them. But I won’t be rehashing what others have said a million times. I won’t be filling space anymore. Our lives are so cluttered already. Shame on me if I add to that.
I want Rusty Basket to be a place where when you see I’ve got a new post up, you want to click it because you know it is something worth reading, not because you are friends with me and feel obligated to help and support me. I’d like my posts to be the sort you can’t help but love and share.
I said that for this new year, I would be focusing on simplifying. Allow me to take the first step.
For now, so long Bloggisphere. I’ll be back when I have something worthwhile to contribute, but for now, I’m afraid I’m happier with less of you in my life.
Much love and a million thanks for the support,
Your dear friend,